Pag umutot:
Americano: pardon me.
British:excuse me
Pinoy: di ako yon mamatay na umutot!!!!!!!!


MAY BAGONG BRAND NG COMPUTERS - JACKIE COMPUTERS - MAY 6 INCH HARD DRIVE PERO WALANG MEMORY.


MILITARY MOTTO'S:
ARMY-no retreat, no surrender!
AIRFORCE- no guts, no glory;
NAVY - no pain, no gain;
POLICE- no valor, no honor;
SECURITY GUARD- NO ID, NO ENTRY!


While in a store to buy a pen.
Erap : Miss may ballpen ba kayo dito?
Clerk : Wala ho kaming ballpen.
Erap (MAD) : putangina!! PENSHOPPE walang tindang ballpen!


BF: Hon, di ako makatulog pwede ba tayong mag-sex?
GF: Hindi pwede! anong palagay mo nung sa kin--sleeping pills?